You feel stuck; stuck between a rock and a hard place. The happiness of others has become a burden you carry without even being asked. You kill yourself to make sure everyone's ok. You avoid conflict at all costs. You mean well but have you ever stopped to think of how selfish you're being?
Ok, I know that was harsh. And I know you're thinking "how does wanting to make OTHER people happy make me selfish"; am I right? I know that you're decisions are made out of love in the best interest of those you care about. Your concern is genuine. But have you ever stopped to think of how all this pleasing affects you? Do you realize how easy it is to do life with people who aren't in conflict? Do you acknowledge how freeing it is to make decisions that go unchallenged?
When everyone is happy you are the one who actually wins.
The time is coming, if it hasn't already, where you won't be able to create a win-win. You'll have to have hard talks and take unpopular stances. The desires of those you care for will stand at direct odds of one another or your beliefs or God's word. What happens then? What do you do when your decision and your voice causes you to stand at odds with everyone you've been trying to please; causes you to stand all alone?
Being a Christian isn't easy. While we're called to love the world if we're living like Christ we won't always be popular. He wasn't. Hey I'm not knocking your pleaser personality. Many times I find myself in the same boat. If we spend our lives focused on the happiness of fickle humans we're setting ourselves up for turbulent sailing. However, when we set our minds and hearts on pleasing God the crash of the waves won't seem so hard.
If you want to follow Me, you must deny yourself the things you think you want. You must pick up your cross and follow Me.
-Matthew 16:24 (VOICE)